A twenty-first century theater of the absurd

I wrote the piece below on September 8, 2011 and while the main body below will remain intact as a parody, there are a few things that I would like to preface them with due to some recent comments of our hero below. The man who took a complete about face after publicly announcing his nation's European aspirations, that man is no other that Viktor Yanukovych, the world's newest dictator.

To an audience of loyal serfs on the Inter TV channel our hero stated, "Society was not informed in a timely manner. We didn't have time for such work. Lately, that dream, and that romanticism, to a great extent the emotions and dreams of the those people led to this protest," said the vassal of Moscovy.

The vassal of Moscovy along with his entire MinTru is not only dilusional, they for the most part suffer from pseudologia fantastica. This is on top of having the traits of people of the steppe which is mentioned in an interview by The Ukrainian Week with Petro Antyp of the Horlivka School of Sculpture. "I think that a common genetic code is what all Ukrainians share. We have common culture, only with different shades. If you take Donetsk Region, it is Ukraine of the steppe....If you take examples from politics, Donetsk residents defended Viktor Yanukovych as one of their own men." However, this is just the tip of the iceberg.

The Steppe mentality is more clearly defined by Oleksandr Halenko, in an interview conducted for Istorychna Pravda on January 22, 2014 and the day that the romantic protests, as expressed by our hero, experienced their greatest violence. Halenko, is a historian-orientalist, turkologist, and a specialist in primary resources. He holds a PhD in History and his head of the Black Sea Institute of Ukrainian History, under the auspices of the National Academy of Sciences of UKraine. In short, he knows a lot more about our hero than our hero knows about himself!

When Halenko is asked about our hero's desire to acquire expensive things his reply is simply the following:"When the Persian historian Rashid-al-Din was asked about how Ghengis Kahn asked his adivisors, "What is happiness for a real man?" Their replied to him in the following way: that you have to sit astride a good horse, which in todays terms means to be in a great car. In order to ensure one's status!

The same historian then said, according to Halenko - the greatest joy for a real man - it is to see their enemy, that is on his knees on the ground before him that is begging him for forgiveness. It is then that the "real man" can continue to be satisfied by the humiliation of his enemy, and entertain the idea with his friends.

This statement in itself confirms very clearly some statements I made two days earlier on my blog and as commentary for Ukraine Business Online, in a piece called "A vindictive form of justice" back in 2011.

With what is going on right now, our hero must be considered in the following light regarding any of his agreements. According to Pavlenko, agreements are one important aspect of the Steppe traditions. Which are narrowed down to to lies and provocations, which are "essential" as all members of the Party of Regions have been voicing. It is an effective means of Steppe diplomacy.

This being said, our hero and his cohorts can not be trusted nor should they be!


Below starts my piece of 2011...and please do read on!

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While many absurdists, who were developing the theater of the absurd during the last century, were born in France, Ukraine's top absurdist of the twenty-first century was born in the village of Zhukovka near Yenakiieve in Donetsk Oblast. His acting career began at an early age when he had difficulties with the stage performer's regulatory guild, better known at that time as the law enforcement authorities. While still an understudy he was taken off the stage of life for a period of three years for robbery and minor assault. When he returned to the stage he once again ran amok and was suspended for another two years for assault.

As our hero tried to find his way he was assigned a mentor, with very close ties to Moscow, commandant of the “Soyuz 3” mission, Georgy Beregovoy who was clearly not a space cadet, but a man with credentials, and someone that had the full trust of Moscow. It is certain; that Moscow knows all there is to know about our hero.

Though he is not the only one they know everything about. There are plenty others on the stage in his land. It has been with the blessing of Moscow that they were able to not simply be actors, but savvy businessmen. At first, they played roles necessary for the system to continue to function as it always had in the past, but eventually there was a curtain call and the world was introduced to them after they had taken control of the stage material's guild and all its assets. These were primarily cheap rags, and not extremely valuable assets on their own and included materials such as carbon, iron, and other raw materials of the stage; but they also acquired the costumers' workshops which transformed these rags into elegant costumes which could be sold on the world market, for extremely high profits. However, for them to continue to make money hand over fist they need inexpensive gas. His land has gas for the commoners.

Some of the actor's names who performed and continue to perform on the stage in his land have all been anointed by Moscow: Renat Akhmetov, Dmytro Firtash, Yura “Yenakievskiy”, Ihor Kolymoyskiy, Victor Medvechuk, Victor Pinchuk, the Surkis brothers, Serhiy Tyhipko and so many others. There were once many more of them, though only the most talented, and with the drive to get ahead still exist today, while complying with all the regulations set out by the Moscow actor's union.

Some of the understudies were at one time considered progressive NGO leaders, others were presented as new and up and coming rising stars, and continue to be put forth by those who are probably thinking that maybe they were mistaken in backing this actor’s career.

Our hero and his circus of clowns have been holding the Gas Princess in a dungeon of late and long ago decided that she overstepped her bounds in coming to an agreement with the Moscow Gas Guild in 2009. She actually saved face for her land as the lands to the west began to freeze. The scabs have disregarded all the international actor's unions’ regulations, and are not allowing for proper process for her to defend herself with her agents, in the Cave's District Hall of Sentencing. This has drawn the ire of many actors on the world stage.

In a performance held at the Dushanbe Guild Leader’s Summit on September 5, 2011, our hero took things to a new level.

He decided that he had to really act well, and he put on a stellar performance for the people of his land. Though due to his pompousness, he might as well have been standing there in new clothes fit for a king, because everyone knows where his true loyalties lie. He spewed off such a tirade of anti-Russian rhetoric, that it is hard to take him seriously. Particularly on the backdrop of many factors: who he is and what Moscow knows about him; that he was once bowled over by the egg of a chicken; that he and his followers have disrespected the actors unions’ rules by attacking the Gas Princess; and given that Messrs. Medvedev and Putin have garnered greater respect than he has on the world stage – the threats of taking legal action against them in the land to the west, warrant calling him the nation's top absurdist, and not much more.


For a more academic understanding of our hero's fine monologue on September 5, 2011 may I refer you to Flawed Strategy by Dr Andrew Zhalko-Tytarenko and Walter Derzko at SmartEconomy.


Vasyl Pawlowsky
Independent Consultant